J-6: Preview on Rewind

I told myself that I would forget this night. That I would overlook every sip I consumed staring down my throat. This evening is a bifocal in which to preview the time ahead. A way to mask my own paranoia, to hide emotions deemed future casualties, to run away and towards accepting arms, to conceal the truth with fables just so the reality lives in fiction, to wear a veil to make others around me feel good and I’ll carry the hurt, and lastly, to bury feelings I own because those “feelings” never felt the same. Most of my time is spent feeling helpless to my own feelings, makes sense, right? As a human being and a person, I tend to take things personal. No, it’s not a quest for perfection because I know that doesn’t exist, but it’s a journey striving for greatness, love, appreciation, and fullness. I flirted with these traits hoping I’ll hold on to one before my times runs dry. Yet, no one is my life cares to take my full thought for what it is because half of my thoughts are a burden. It’s the weak side in me, the one I carry in my heart that drives my actions, acts out my desires, and destroys the path in front. When I was young I was taught and told that I would live this life in rewind. I’m looking through the lens now and something tells me otherwise. If you’re a pretender or a believer, I’ll wave to you from afar.

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About inkforthought

i just like to create, share, love, and laugh.
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